Sine Cura

Just for y'all

2005-06-28T15:26:00.000-07:00

I had to share with all of you the newest, hottest video from
Jessica Simpson.

Enjoy, but ya gotta click here

I like her and if you have a penis--I know you will definitely like her after this. I hear it from all my guy friends.

Taker EZ!

P.S. Gotta love Willie!

Hell week

2005-06-16T11:22:00.000-07:00

The tornado is still turning and I am being flung around like a rag doll.

Monday was the WORST day I have had in months, Tuesday was just a fraction shy of beating Monday.

This issue below has since been rectified. We are all communicating clearly and have a renewed understanding of our dynamic.

It seems that two of my family/close friends don't know me anymore and don't feel that I am a good person to know since my last break up. They came to me with concerns and expectations of me agreeing with them or seeing their point of view about how I should meditate right now and reflect on "who I am". I am meeting too many new people as a distraction of getting to know myself.

I disagreed strongly. I know who I am for ONCE in my life. I AM doing the things I wanted to include in my life. I am more confident in my person so I am able to meet more people now than before. This isn't negative, this isn't me not knowing who I am...this is me being me for once and they aren't handling the change. I am not rude, mean, unkind, or anything. I am just more excited about things outside myself. Does this mean that I have stopped looking inside myself, NO!

I am reflective, introspective, etc. I do take time for myself to enjoy life with just my thoughts and aspirations. They honestly don't know who I am anymore. It saddens them that I don't believe that I should be living my life as they see. My life saddens them...

It saddens me...after all these years--they just don't know me. The only thing that matters is that I go to bed at night excited about my future, happy about my present, and thankful for my past.

The world evolves as do I.

Snap...it's gone

2005-06-14T14:45:00.000-07:00

In an instant my world can change from cloud 9 to a chaotic tornado of emotions...I'll be up shortly because that is my nature, but living in a tornado is no bueno.

Summer breeze...makes me feel fine

2005-06-08T12:10:00.000-07:00

Quick little ditty about what the heck I've been up to...

Let's see, I went on an Maine adventure which most of you have commented on my pics I emailed out. Yes, it was cold and no I didn't meet the firemen! Lisa gave me a stern warning not to ask to ride down the fire station pole. Since she signs-off on my paycheck, I thought "okay, I'll obey...but just this once!" haha.

The rest of the trip was fantabulous. A lot of wine, beer, and relaxation.

I am currently dating a guy 2 years younger than me and so far, enjoy his goofy company. Although, he has this obsession with Kenny Chesney that might be considered freakish. (kidding, babe).

Spurs have moved on again so I am anticipating more drinking in the next couple of weeks as I cheer them on and scream at the refs. Love the finals, man. Erika, you'd be proud because I have been told that my friends can hear me yelling at the TV from outside. (Memories of South Oats Apts, huh?)

I lost another 3 pounds and am only 8 pds away from my goal...I'm going to maintain for now and hit the regime hard again once the finals are over. Something about drinking and getting up at 5:30 am to hit the gym-isn't really working out in my world.

Well, that's it now. This is so much easier than emailing each of you. Toss me a line or two and tell me what's up with you, too!

Taker EZ!

I've got a plan...

2005-05-18T15:21:00.000-07:00

Finally, I have a plan for my life that I think matches my life long desires at the same time.

Can't release all details, but let's just say I am hopefully going to be rich from this idea (actually 3 separate ideas that spin together to make my money making company).

I have had fantastic feedback from both x and y chromies so this should be an excellent opportunity. Told you I have to be vague, sorry, but I am SO excited!

I am a saucey sex kitten whose intelligent and gosh darn it--lots of people will buy these! I want one so I am going to have to make it myself!

Money, money, money-MONEY(Trump song)

Not that I am materialistic, just eager to explore/travel whenever the hell I want to!

Wish me luck and great vibes! Gotta go, I to have to research my niche market, etc.

Park Bench

2005-04-25T14:09:00.000-07:00

The woman sits on an old wet bench
Rags of fabric draped over her earth-stained hands
Her smile's filled with gaps
Her head shifts to the open blue
Half-opened lids filled with dew
Vistors to her home walk cautiously by
keeping their distance
afraid she'll tarnish their existence
Birds peck at her mangled locks of straw
The woman still lives above them all

04.2003

Melancholy

2005-04-25T14:04:00.000-07:00

Butterflies flutter toward the sun
roses fill the air
now Spring has begun
Rays of laughter fill the parks
yet, I fill alone;
left in the dark

Bitten

2005-04-25T14:01:00.000-07:00

Canine teeth rip the skin
my heart races
I'm being chased from within

Hurdling fences 12 feet high
scaping my knees
as I fall from the sky

The odiferous smell
of human sweat
streams of my brow

Damn, I'm
caught
in
your
net...

Reflections

2005-04-25T13:20:00.000-07:00

Tortured by the past
I sit and ponder
Tears stream past my chin
from memories made
the unthinkable is on the rise
no fear subsides in me

Smiling, I gaze the sky
clouds rolling by
birds singing
their praise of life

Gloomy weather doesn't suppress my need
to be filled with glee
I plea with my soul
to come out from under
the shelter of comfortability

A child with hope
I now sit
like the leaves of spring
I am about to grow

The future is blinding
my heart is pounding full
of sugar and all that is sweet
in determination to succeed
not just in my career
but in love

I have found a deeper
respect for who I shall become
An expression of jubiliation
is given to those surrounding me

Exploding with excitment of turning 24
Living my life by my soul
is an answer from the world
I will explore

Knowingly I look forward
and intuitively I sense
that soon
I will gain the same influence
in my new beginning

written 2.28.03 I always write a poem on my birthday to explain my feelings on the previous year and the hopes I have in the year to come!

Guilty by Association

2005-04-22T13:04:00.000-07:00

I am ready to explore
leaping out my door
propelling my worn sandals
across the dusty ground to a new found...

World.

World racing by
as I peer into the abyss
that society has created...

Hatred.

Hatred creeps by
as I marvel why
humans all proclaim
they aren't the one's to...

Blame.

Blame traps many minds
as it erupts from behind
the fragile glass mold
clasping the truth that must unfold...

in Ourselves.

Summer surprise

2005-04-13T15:02:00.000-07:00

Something fierce drills into my core
glimpses of you
the laughter;
sweet smells of penetration

Chocolate and cream
pour over me
skimming my breasts

Now with passions rising
breathing hard and heart pounding
I explore this man, this sculpture

Sweet soft kisses
caressing my mind
soothing my soul

I can't escape the scent
your skin touching mine
the power of two intertwined
enlaced in a force that
swirls around the darkness

Whispering, " I want you,"
"Make love to me"
We dive deep into the bliss
hip to hip

Riiipppp, oh shit!

LMAO

Livin'-Lovin', I'm just a Woman!

2005-04-11T12:31:00.000-07:00

Too much has been happening for me to write about every little account in my life. I will say that I am FULLY enjoying singlehood. Not looking forward to the crazy people in the bars, but it's worth the hidden treasure I'll seek.

I am back to writing poetry in my journal. Some of which I have surprised myself and realized some aspects of my life that need fine tuning. I've missed it more than I realized.

I have to share this experience with those that I love...

Last Saturday I was euphoric. I realized while driving back with my "girls" from an overnight stay in Marble Falls, that I am going to have the life I deserve. Finally, excitement returns to my life and I can't help but breathe it in with everything I am. It was very surreal and peaceful. I am saddened that my relationship didn't end up the way we both dreamed. I overcome the gloom with the knowledge of my strength. I have finally listened to my soul and broke through the bars of the jail I created for myself. Love is one thing, self-sacrifice is another. And I definitely hit that hole a long while ago. So, lessons learned and movin' on.

It seems now that I am a woman on the mission to seek out thrills and give what I can to my friends. I am labeled the "wild one" of the group and I would agree 100%. I'm a little more Carrie, some Charlotte, and a lot of Samantha rolled up into one. (In case you missed it--that was a reference to "Sex in the City").

Also, if any of you know of great, humorous, single men out there (or woman--KIDDING) than do me a favor and invite us to drinks. ALWAYS drinks first before committing to dinner...that's my rule!

Also, I feel like a road trip. Any takers? Email me, I'm game for somewhere near water!

No fears, No tears

2005-04-04T10:54:00.000-07:00

Well, some of you might be in shock once given my latest news flash, but I broke it off with Mike last Tuesday.

It was a looong 8 years with great memories and I will always love him for who he is and who he will become, but sometimes love isn't all that holds people together.

I really tried to make it work after our last break up 2 years ago...I wanted my insides to match the outside, but I just couldn't overcome the gut wrenching feeling I had that something/someone else is out there for me. I kept feeling that I wasn't living the life I was suppose to be living. I prayed to have the feeling go away (which most of you know I don't really do often anymore). The feeling never went away, so I prayed on how to best approach the subject to not hurt Mike as much. It came up unexpectedly and shocked both of us. We both knew it was coming, but "when" was the question.

Without going into anymore detail, I will say that I feel so great right now. I feel awful about the close of my relationship with Mike, but for the first time in 2 years, I feel completely satisfied with myself. I made a hard decision, but it was the right decision and I am excited as what my life will bring me.

To our friends,

I hope that you will understand my decision is not to be selfish, but to be honest. My nature is to follow my instinct and I ignored that for 2 years. I can't ignore it anymore and that is why I had to let go. My instinct is that I am going to be better than okay! Ohhh, yes I am! I also understand that some of us may not stay connected from this and I am truly sorry for any loss friendships. Maybe in time...

Namaste,
Vonnie

Doin' it well....

2005-03-24T13:12:00.000-08:00

Been pretty busy lately. Also, for my friends who read this often to "check-in" with me...sorry, but when the sunshine is out, so am I. I won't be writing much during the sizzlin' summer months. You can always call or email me though.

Well, Mike is probably going to school in Colorado. I am more than likely staying in Austin to finish my BA while volunteering at a PT clinic, in order to be accepted into a Physical Therapy program in 2006. Yikes, I will be in school forever!

Anyone need a roommate? I actually liked living on my own, so I am sure that is what I will do. Nothing like coming home to a place that is ALL yours and taking it easy.

As I have not written much in poetry lately, nor in my very personalized journal at home...I have had a lot on my mind. For instance, my goals.

I did set out to start a workout regime and well, I have stuck to my goal. I am happy to say that I lost 10 pds. in 2 1/2 weeks while gaining more muscle. Can't wait to get back into my old sexy summer clothes. Not to mention, I will be ready to train for the Freescale in May.

Finally, I have also come to the lost realization that I need to focus on myself again. I get so caught up in helping people that I don't take time for myself. So, I am going to take a weekend to rejuvenate by the waterside in a few weeks and relax.

Everything else seems to be going pretty great. I have been out of character lately, but extremely happy, which rattle's me a bit. Although, happiness is the spice of life and I need to remember to focus on that.

So, hopefully, some of you will visit Tejas soon and I will try to keep in touch with y'all as much as I can.

"Beware the Ides of March"

2005-03-15T13:29:00.000-08:00

As Shakespeare wrote in Julius Caesar, "Beware the Ides of March." (the 15th day of March)

Well spoken, dear friend. Since my last blog, which was...omigosh, Feb. 28th. Okay, so I have been busy (or is that lazy? hmmmm...)

Well, the Ide's of March has kicked me in the butt this year. Here is an, "Ode to the Ide's," written by me for me.

Ode to the Ide's
eeew...do I despise
your difficult maze
drifting like a fog
blanketing victims
to whom you call
whispering sugar
yet feeding vinegar
You are defeated
and depleted
for no matter
what ill you cause
wreckage or loss
I can't be dimmed by your anger within
Erect I stand
as tall as I am
You, dear friend,
shall not conquer
Meeee THIS year!

Or if I was 100% Irish....

Aye, Ide's of March
is finally here
Comest on in...
I'll buy ya'a beer!

The key to negative events happenin' in me life now, is to remain positive. For instance, a car is a material object and allergies will pass (won't they?). Besides, I have great friends, plenty of drink, and no distrubing past.

I just thought I would ramble on my break. Taker E-Z!

2005-02-25T15:30:00.000-08:00

25 or 26 or 25 or 26?

I got mad skilz in the skillet!

2005-02-23T15:41:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I cooked tofu for the first time. Now, I hate to cook. I am a girl who messed up Mac-n-cheese. I followed the directions--to a point. I got cocky and like anyone--I forgot to drain the water.

My roommates at the time, laughed their asses off at my new Mac-n-cheese soup. I was like, "Damn, Cheryl's mac never looks like this, what the hell?"

Later, we smoked and they were still laughing at my Cordon Bleu ass. This is basically what happens each time I attempt to cook a meal.

So, back to my tofu. I am ecstatic that I was able to cook a delicous meal of brown rice, steamed cauli and broc with tofu. Mmmmmm. It wasn't burned, watery, or cold in the middle.

Family members and friends know I can't cook, so I decided to give myself props for my "special" achievement.

Achoo...

2005-02-17T12:52:00.000-08:00

Still baddling with the flu and allergies. Achoo.

Sniff, sniff...I'm feelin' betta and I don'dta look like Rudolf anymore.

Lader...

Homemade Valentine Bikini

2005-02-14T15:11:00.000-08:00

Time for sexy fun

Okay, I thought I would post this in case there are any ladies without a sexy surprise for their lover. This is my own design and it is extremely easy to make, it is completely edible and will put a smile on your man's face and most importantly--YOURS!

First the ingredients, which can all be found at your local grocery store:

Small tubing of icing (Choose your flavor, Strawberry might be nice for this one).
Red color sugar crystals
Pilsbury Sugar cookie dough
1 bag of rope licorice (Strawberry, mmm)
Multi-color cake decorating gel

Baking instructions:

Make dough into a heart shape. It should be a little bigger than your private area. Don't make it tooooo thick or your bikini bottom will not stay up. You want to bake the cookie a bit longer than suggested, but take it out before it becomes burnt. Once the cookie is out of oven poke two holes at least the width of the licorice on each side of the heart (there should be 4 holes total). Allow the cookie to cool and harden. The earlier you bake the cookie the better. If you can, try to bake the cookie two days ahead so that it becomes hard (like your man will be when he sees you in it!).

While cookie is cooling:

Get topless. Use icing to make a heart on each breast just barely larger than each nipple. Make sure to fill in the hearts with icing. Next take colored sugar and sprinkle on nipples. (Very sexy!)

Top of bikini is done.

Once the cookie is hard, it is time to decorate using the decorating gels. I would write out a short-n-sweet message on mine like "My heart is yours".

Next, take 4 pieces of rope licorice and string it through each hole you made. Loop the string and carefully tie a knot to hold licorice in place. This is hard to describe, but it is easy to figure out. Make sure to leave enough length in the licorice to tie around your hips.

Finally, String up your bikini bottom. Place the heart right of over your lovely and gently tie the licorice around to your buttocks. If you can tie a bow great, but if not that's okay. Also, let a couple longer strands lay softly on your butt . It will be fun to play with later.

Alternative accessories:

White thigh highs and white high-heels, a pair of nice elegant earrings, and to be extra creative you can make a necklace out of the rope licorice. Suggestion: Use a NEW french tickler as the "jewel" or something else that is fun.

Like, I said this is my own creation. You should tweak it to your needs. Also, make sure you have a wet and a dry towel, two glasses of bubbly, and quite a few candles by the bed side.

Bon Appetit!

Shackled AGAIN!

2005-02-13T12:30:00.000-08:00

Just after Noon on a Sunday, the sun is shining the air is crisp and the vibrations of spring reverberate through the words of Marley as I cruise 360 with my pup, Karma.

Sweet spring is almost here.

Unfortunately, this is the pinnacle of my Sunday. I now have arrived at work to "catch up" on the mundane reports of my daily life. The flu blues captured me last week. I'm amerced in an office dungeon to play clickity-clack with my keyboard.

If you're outside on this fantabulous day...I am ever so envious. At least I can still have the notes flowing, my head bouncing, and the door open whilst I must labor.

Taker EZ!

2005-02-09T10:37:00.000-08:00

The scene of the crime!

Me and Andilynn's 1st wreck

2005-02-09T10:17:00.000-08:00

Above is my Andilynn. She's my first car and we have had 5 wonderful years together. But this past Monday, she was bruised. I must say, that I am pleased that I have never been in any wreck before now.

I don't get upset about material things. Don't get me wrong, I like things to look nice, clean, etc., but if something becomes destroyed, I don't become frustrated like the Hulk.

SIDEBAR: Although, I am sure men would love it if I did...Nothing like a topless green woman jumping around in ripped shorts trying to overtake the evils. I think I just came up with my next Halloween outfit. (Kinky AND cool).

Back to the crash.

I was on S. Lamar in the middle lane STOPPED at a red light, when all of a sudden my car moves forward and I hear my Andilynn screeching. Andilynn is the name of my car. I call her Andi for short, but Andilynn is her full name.

I pull over and said to myself before getting out of the car, "You stupid b#tch!" I wouldn't say that to anyone directly, but this woman hit a freakin' STOPPED car. That is pretty damn stupid!

I call the authorities and wait, and wait, and wait. While waiting this lady has the nerve to say I ran into her. Um, excuse me? (I said this). "Ma'am, (trying to stay respectful to the elders) I was at a complete stop. My car wasn't moving. You CLEARLY hit me from behind."

She argued that I wasn't there when she was trying to switch lanes and then BAMM I appeared out of thin air.

"Ma'am, traffic was stopped first of all, so there is NO WAY I could just "Appear". Secondly, the direction in which the paint was scratched off of my car onto yours, obviously concludes that YOU hit my car and not the other way around."

She became real quite and said she wasn't going to argue about it. She goes and sits in her car and comes back and asks if I just want to forget the po-po. Hell no, you old hag!

Blame my ass and then ask me to leave the coppers out of it. Do I have RETARD written anywhere on my body or car?

Finally, the police come and site her with a nice traffic ticket. All I have to do now is deal with the insurance mess, but that's not too bad.

At least, Andilynn and I are still able to drive and nobody else got hurt, right?

I just needed to vent...the freakin' nerve of some people.

I am a hotdog!

2005-02-08T20:07:00.000-08:00

I grew up in Frankfort, Indiana. Home of the Frankfort Hotdogs. Our mascot is the wiener dog. It was leaked to me that Frankfort finally made the big time. We actually got our town on national television with the Annual Hot Dog Festival. Great American fun in the middle of no where. Let's have a winnie roast...burn'em, burn'em...Our rivals cheered this chant at games.

MUST SEE TV!

All American Festivals Episode FE1F03
AIR TIMES:

February 20, 2005 2:30 PM ET/PT

Hot Dog Festival Frankfort, Indiana is going to the dogs, hotdogs that is. The hot dog recipe contest promises to be a dog eat dog battle. It’s gonna be a tail wagging good time, so hop on the hotdog bandwagon. (The show picked the most intelligent people in my ol' town!)

Recipes
Frankie Beans
Kid's Casserole
Hot Dog Noodle Casserole

Sexy Bitches

2005-02-08T20:02:00.000-08:00

December Party #2 (I'm the only one in a hat)

2005-02-08T20:01:00.000-08:00

Early December Party #1 (I'm the one on the left)

Niiiiiiiiice

2005-02-04T15:28:00.000-08:00

Great week!

Monday, I come into the office wishing it were still Saturday. All of sudden the prez. and v.p. of the company I work for were chit-chatting behind closed doors.

I was minding my own biznez, when the prez. cracked open the door and asked me to come into her office.

I thought my stomach was going to come out my mouth. (ew)

I gave her this look of now what did I do?

She said, "you are not in trouble, now get in here!"

You see closed doors in the past meant trouble. Either you or someone else. I've worked for the company about 4 years now, excluding my Interior Design job last year (my adventure with them will be coming soon) so I have encountered this pleasure before.

Well, here's what happened to me...

I walk in and they both laugh, because I look confused and worried. (I am a GREAT asset to this company and I know that they would never fire me, but you have to stay humble.)

They ask me to go to Maine with them for a mini-vacate over Memorial weekend.

Kerplunck!

That was my jaw hitting the concrete. "uh, what? why?...Hell, yeah I'll go!" How much?

FREE...freakin' f*ck'n FREE. They paid for my round trip tix and we are staying at the prez. vacation home on Peake's Island. Not only that, but the days we'll be gone I get paid for without it counting against my personal time. Sweeeeeeeeet!

I would say, that this week was a great week. I hope y'all had a great one too!

Journalistic Nonsense, blah

2005-02-03T17:18:00.000-08:00

Reading the local paper (or most published articles of information based on current events). I find myself irritated at the journalists and their prey. I say prey, because that is what we are-- prey. They are the hunters, setting up twisted, mind-explosive stories to capture the attention of the hungry. We are the hungry. Hungry for TRUTH, yet settling for fiction! When journalist start taking cash from lobbyists, political figures, or the money hungry corporations...then aren't they no longer journalists, but the PR person for that entity? Really, they are paid to say what the buyer wants.

I understand not all journalist are this way, but for those who take money to soley persuade the population with numbing inaccurancies should have their degree's revoked. Think about. If the journalist professionals had even a fraction of the legalities (that most other's adhere to) when covering a "story", don't you think they would assure the facts were indeed legitimate. Then money offered by these "high powers" of persuasion would no longer have an upper hand to the minds of the people.

An actual news system that gives us...do I dare say? Freakin the TRUTH! Unfortunately, I know that my thoughts on the subject will always remain that... just thoughts.

But wait, maybe it IS like Jack said, "YOU CAN"T HANDLE THE TRUTH!" hmmm? I wonder if people are satisfied with not knowing. Is NOT knowing allowing us better lives?

I will say this, not knowing is one thing, but leaking out 100% poisoned information is another!

Mefirst

2005-02-02T19:11:00.000-08:00

Sitting here resting while my mind is racing. I feel so lazy compared to my thoughts. Sometimes it feels like time fast forwards, yet I am still seeing it all in slow motion. Is this normal? Normal, yeah...nothing is normal it's just all different.

Sometimes we write to provoke others...good/bad doesn't really matter. Just expressing my secrets, my thoughts, my fears. Maybe some laughter, too. This is my first blog so we'll see how it goes. It could be fascinating or it may blow. I'll find out...here it goes. (I rhyme frequently)

Phantom Dream

2005-02-02T17:17:00.000-08:00

Looking back at the years gone by,
I see my innocense
fading...diminishing...evaporating...
in my eyes.

The saddness, The laughter
the touch of a hand
grabbing...stealing...raping
what I felt within.

Bzzzz, I awoke.

It was all a dream
I am still lying in bed
pondering...envisioning...contemplating
that last scene.

When the eyes close
and the subconsciousness wakes
Are we still innocent
once we open that gate?

Inferno

2005-02-02T17:11:00.000-08:00

Reflections, flickering, dancing, hissing,
Destroying, creating, tantilating
whispering, summoning

my mind
my soul
my desire

Like the flame of a fire